Why it matters: Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 13:1-3: that nothing has meaning without Love. Love is so important that we say God is Love, and yet, isn’t Nutella too?
Word of wisdom: Nutella is definitely not the highest form of love. The word “love” has been overused. This is partly because the English language has only one word to describe many types of loves. In our culture, this single word is used to describe our attitudes towards everything from chocolate to friends, to family, to our spouses.
But since we agree that chocolate and your partner are inherently different in value, we could agree that the “love” we feel towards chocolate is different than the “love” we owe to our lover. Hence, we mean two different things. So, shouldn’t there be two different words? Well, in the Greek language, there are. Not just two, but four:
In the Bible, Jesus uses different terms for love. Since the New Testament was originally written in Greek, here are the different meanings of love that Jesus uses:
→ Storge (στοργή): This is the love between family members, such as the natural affection between parents and children. While the specific word "storge" is not used frequently in the New Testament, the concept is evident in Jesus' teachings about familial love and care.
Matthew 12:46-50: “While Jesus was still talking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside, wanting to speak to him. Someone told him, “Your mother and brothers (storge – spiritual kinship) are standing outside, wanting to speak to you. He replied to him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers (storge – spiritual kinship). For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother (storge – spiritual kinship).”
→ Philia (φιλία): This is the love between friends, a deep camaraderie and affectionate regard. It signifies a mutual and close bond, often expressed through shared values, experiences, and mutual respect.
John 15:15: "I do not call you servants any longer, because the servant does not know what the master is doing; but I have called you friends (philia), because I have made known to you everything that I have heard from my Father.”
→ Eros (ἔρως): This is romantic, passionate (sexual) love. It is also the upward impulse of the human heart towards what is True, Good, and Beautiful. It is the Greek term from which the English word erotic derives. The New Testament does not specifically use the term "eros," but Jesus' teachings on marriage and the union between a man and a woman reflect the sanctity and importance of this type of love.
Matthew 19:5-6: "Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate."
Song of Solomon 4:9 (Old Testament): "You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride [...]"
→ Agape (ἀγάπη), also Charity: This is the highest form of love, selfless, sacrificial, and unconditional. It is also the most used word for love in the Bible. It is the love that God has for humans and that humans are called to have for one another. This love is not based on merit of the person loved, but rather based on them as an image bearer of Christ. It is generous. It continues to give even when the other is unkind, unresponsive and unworthy. It is called “true love” because it is based on Truth, not feelings. Pope Benedict says, “Without truth, charity degenerates into sentimentality. Love becomes an empty shell, to be filled in an arbitrary way.” Jesus emphasizes this type of love in His teachings and especially as He acts it out during His suffering.
John 15:12-13: "This is my commandment, that you love (agape) one another as I have loved (agape) you. No one has greater love (agape) than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”
Matthew 22:37-39: " He said to him, “‘You shall love (agape) the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the greatest and first commandment. And a second is like it: ‘You shall love (agape) your neighbor as yourself.'"
💡The Tip: start noticing what kind of “love” people are referring to. Your arbitrary use of the word could indicate a loss of appreciation for the profound meaning of true love.